sex and pancakes

JMJ
AMDG

I hate the whole phrasing of "waiting" till marriage.

Basically, it comes down to this: I am not married. I am still of value. I am still able to live a complete life.

Sex is natural. It's a gift from God. Sex is necessary for the propagation of the human species. Sex is necessary for bringing spouses together and is an important part of the whole "being married thing". It can be misused. So can cheesecake, which is also a gift from God(obviously). The awesomeness of cheesecake is not a good reason to use in an improper fashion, such as using it as a Frisbee or eating so much of it you vomit. The same goes for sex: there are proper places for it and improper places for it.

But sex, like cheesecake, is not necessary for happiness. Sex is not necessary for joy. Sex is not necessary to living a human life full of messiness and Christmases and all the dumb things about growing up. Sex is not necessary to have friends and and frozen yogurt and fireworks. Sex will not be a part of everyone's life.

I hate the word waiting because waiting implies that sex will happen some day when in fact I have no guarantee that it will. I hate the word waiting because, to me at least, waiting implies that I am just biding my time being single until the Perfect Catholic Boy descends on a cloud from heaven so that I can finally start living life.

I hate the word waiting because to me, at least, waiting implies that I am doing nothing of worth now.

I actually haven't made pancakes in like a whole month, so
these are not my pancakes. Sorry.

*

Earlier in the summer, I went through a mad pancake making phase.

When you make pancakes you have to mix together the dry ingredients. You have to mix the wet ingredients. You have to mix the wet ingredients into the dry ingredients. You have to ladle out the pancake batter onto the pan or griddle (which you've sprayed) and then cook the pancakes. After that you get to eat them.

While I am making pancakes, my sister is popping into the kitchen to see how far along I am and can she have the pink plate? how much longer? and a million other questions.

My sister is waiting to eat pancakes.

I am not. Am I eating pancakes as I cook them? No. But I am invested in another task. I am making pancakes, and that is what I am focused on.

I think that maybe making pancakes is like being single. At any rate, I've been doing a lot of both lately.

*

A guy at the Y where I used to work approached me one day. So, I was wondering, do you have a boyfriend?

He was kinda cute, with a shy smile and eyes that desperately wanted me to say No, I'm single and here's my number. 

except...

No, I'm single, I said. But I'm good with that for right now.

Being single and making pancakes are a lot alike. I'm getting pretty good at both.

*

I don't rush through pancake making. I do it correctly, making sure all my measurements are accurate, and it would be stupid to skip adding the flour because I just wanted some finished pancakes as fast as possible.

I'm single right now. There is no way around this. I've discerned that NET Ministries is the right place for me right now, and so I am not married or a consecrated religious, and not actively pursuing either right now.
Right now, making pancakes is where I'm at, and I'm having fun with it, making tiny ones, smiley-face ones, big ones the size of the pan and all the while belting out musical theatre tunes. Popular! You're gonna be popular...

*

Sometimes people make pancakes and never eat them, like my friends and family who are gluten-intolerant. Some people, like my sister, make pancakes but are taking a break from grain for a while and so might never eat pancakes, but there's a possibility.

Sometimes people fall in love a dozen times but never actually find That Person. Sometimes people decide that marriage isn't for them; that religious life is, or that singlehood is.

Maybe some day I'll sit down to a pancake breakfast. Maybe I won't. Both are viable options.

I am not waiting. Right now, I am busy making pancakes and singing and stressing about life and doodling in sharpie on most of the things I own.

To all my single ladies (and men): you can stop waiting. Stop waiting and start living. Someday, marriage may be your path to holiness, but it is not this day. Learn along to love where you are; learn to love the right now.

And right now? I am hella good at making pancakes.

i think i maybe took this analogy too far but anyways i make good pancakes and i'm single so yeah

hey, so like, i leave for NET on Thursday morning, so please pray for me!